Where I've been for 2012:
The year 2012 came as a surprise (because of my Luzon, Visayas and Mindanao adventures) and at the same time, I had several regrets. I was reading Paulo Coelho's messages and one line says, "Never regret anything that made you smile last 2012." True. I made decisions that made me excited and happy but after a period of time, I lost the passion and drive to continue what I was doing. 
I am not wishful thinking on what I want to happen for 2013. I don't want to dictate what should be for the months to come. I'm not wishing for 2013 to give me all the positive things I can think of because it won't and it can't. Everything will happen according to the will of God, if we let Him take over. What I am hoping for 2013 is to be able to make wiser decisions. 2012 became a constant battlefield of choices between opportunities- both claimed and wasted.
I have to accept the fact that in three months, I will no longer avail student discounts or have the luxury of playing Dance Dance Revolution in arcades. The thought of leaving school and studying saddens me and this thought just popped when I was in Cagayan de Oro. Everytime I go out, I see Ateneo students hanging around, talking like forever and eating non-stop. I used to be like one of them. The truth is, I miss running after deadlines in the Engineering building hallway, fully armed with my backpack, laptop, newsprint and calculator. I miss hanging out in our department's office with free wifi and annoying anyone who goes inside. If there is something I will never grow tired of, that would be learning. I hope that I will still have the chance to go back to school. :)
Aside from the learning opportunities, everyone expects a promising career from me. I hate to admit, but one of my fears in life, is the fear of not meeting the expectation of the people around me. This year, it's time to take the risk and no more living in fear. I believe everyone's life is not a product of circumstances, it's a product of our choice. And if I will continue to make decisions based on what everyone wants me to be, I will never have the fulfillment. I always repeat the line again and again to my friends that "You do your best work if you do a job that makes you happy."
This year, I will write more and more each day (online or offline). So expect this blog to contain more words. One friend told me that I will always have the writer in me. I stopped my creative writing career after graduating in high school in order to pursue my interest in debates. I was a coward debater but one of the reasons why I was dying to join the team was to boost my confidence and improve my communication skills. And I was right, I did realize that goal (special mention to my team mates and mentor). So now I'm back to writing, after feeling that my passion to write (is there such thing?) faded through the years and it diverted to fashion, photography and blogging.
I know, we want so many things and dreams to happen this year, things we are not sure of. This year, one thing's for sure: this is not gonna be my battle, its the Lord's battle.
The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still.
Exodus 14:14
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